For some reason, the investment newsletter audience (and their publishers) find “anti-aging” pitches quite appealing… maybe it’s because so many of us are reaching those “golden years” and wondering how to extend them without pain or poverty. I’m not quite in the “core” demographic yet at 49, but I’ve got the knees and hips of a 75-year-old… so I feel like I can sympathize a little bit.
The pitch this time from Hilary Kramer, in an ad for her GameChangers newsletter, is that there’s a $6 “anti-aging” stock that’s about to soar to $100 a share… and that news coming soon will start that big run.
We know, of course, that newsletter ad copywriters like to dramatically over-emphasize the near-term catalyst a stock might have — after all, their one goal is to get you to subscribe NOW, they know that if they give you any breathing room or tell you that the big news won’t be coming for a few months, there’s much less likelihood that you’ll pull out your credit card. And, of course, time and thought are the enemies of the impulse newsletter purchase.
So we’ll check out Kramer’s clues, let you know what stock she’s teasing so we can defuse that “gotta subscribe NOW” urge a bit, and then you can think for yourself… deal?
Here’s the lead-in for the email that I saw over the weekend:
“A group of West Coast scientists have created the impossible. This miracle drug is being called the Immortality Switch, because it actually reverses age-related diseases.
“According to the Mayo Clinic, the Immortality Switch shows ‘very promising results…’
“And CNBC recently alerted investors it helps ‘stop or reverse age-related diseases.'”
Sounds pretty impressive, right? The Mayo Clinic is a big brand name, and CNBC is full of ratings-chasing clowns but still, people watch… so that’s a big deal if they’re “endorsing” this idea.
And we’ve got some other biggies on board as well, apparently… more from Kramer…
“… billionaires like Jeff Bezos, the founder of Amazon, and Peter Thiel, co-founder of PayPal, are pouring their own personal fortunes into the biotech company creating the Immortality Switch.”
OK, so sure, Jeff Bezos and Peter Thiel are on top of the world, and would like to live forever. I get it. If I had billions of dollars I’d be throwing it at my favorite causes, too.
Apparently some other big investment “brand names” are also buying…
“Wall Street heavy hitters, Fidelity, Goldman Sachs, Vanguard, and BlackRock can barely contain themselves—anticipating the profit potential ahead from this $6 stock.”
Or maybe they’re not buying? I have no idea what “can barely contain themselves” means, which probably means it doesn’t mean anything… those words are just there to build up a sense of urgency.
And then we get to the really urgent stuff — what’s going to make this stock start to “soar?”
“In a matter of days, the Immortality Switch goes