This is one of those teaser ads that’s really tough to resist — a “hidden” investment that “you were never meant to know about,” a secret bargain, leveraged returns, they’re genuinely “contrarian,” and … and this is no small feat … the ad makes you feel like you can actually get the benefit of those much-hated government bailouts that have both the Occupy-ers and the Tea Party folks (and, frankly, pretty much everyone in-between) still wearing their grouchy pants.
No grouchy pants? Sorry, sometimes it’s hard to turn that off when you’ve been trying to amuse fussy little Gumshoes for a while.
But anyway, the teaser pitch for our Friday File edutainment is from Nilus Mattive at Weiss Research … and instead of selling us on a newsletter subscription, it sounds like they’re just selling a special report about these “bailout contract” investments called “Government Bailout Contracts: THE Contrarian Investment for 2012.”
And I’ll start you out with their little closer P.S.:
“Interestingly enough, Tom and I mentioned these government bailout contracts at a posh industry insider conference we attended — to guys with offshore accounts, Ferraris, and 50-foot yachts.
“Nobody asked a single question or made a single comment. And based on that — along with the frantic smartphone activity — we believe they had never heard of these investments … AND that they were probably all secretly planning on trying to research them and buy them as soon as they got home. Too bad they won’t find a lot of info out there! I guess they’ll just have to reserve their own copies of this report.”
And of course, it’s so terribly exclusive — only 500 copies of the report available, and at a good ol’ bargain price of $495 (as you math savants already figured out, that means a nice clean $247,500 for them, which I suppose makes it worth their while).
So that’s what they’re selling — how do they try to convince us to buy?
Well, apparently they’re hard to learn about:
“So you won’t be surprised when I tell you that …
“I ‘Googled’ These Special Investments and Only Got Back THREE Useful Results …
“Right after Tom first mentioned these investments to me, I did what anyone would do — I fired up my trusty web browser and started searching the Internet for more information.”
That’s kind ...