Never does this get boring.
Every time thing seem to run a little dry here at Gumshoe HQ, and the reservoir of hypetastic teasers dips a little bit below the intake pipe … well, the flood comes again, regular as the rains (if not quite as seasonal). That’s how it’s been for a thousand teaser tips now (yes, we hit our thousandth article here on the free site just yesterday — throw in another 250 or so articles on the paid Stock Gumshoe Irregulars site over the years and we could have probably wallpapered the Chrysler Building with our bloviating), and I imagine that’s how it will be in the months to come.
So while looking over some teasers that, frankly, had just started to get a little bit boring … I was delighted to get the latest one from Dr. David Eifrig that tell us about using a “Godfather Offer” to “force rich investors to pay you $720 in 24 hours” and “always get paid … no matter what.”
Ahhhhh …. for your friendly neighborhood Gumshoe, reading a pitch like that is like settling into a hot bath.
Of course, Eifrig goes out of his way to say that this little “secret” that he learned at Goldman Sachs is not illegal or violent like so many other “godfather offers” might be.
The ad is a pitch for his Retirement Trader newsletter, which is an active stock and option trading letter with probably a bit of an income focus — and, not coincidentally, a letter that gives his publisher an “upgrade” option to sell to subscribers of Eifrig’s lower cost Retirement Millionaire newsletter that serves as more of a “retirement lifestyle” resource.
And it’s actually one of two teasers going out for this letter right now, both of which are teasing the same basic idea of making $720 — the other ad pitches this as more of a “earn money from home with your computer” idea, but if you give me the choice of a “work from home” pitch and a “godfather offer mafia shakedown” pitch, well, the second one is obviously going to be the “offer I can’t refuse.”
Eifrig (OK, his copywriter — but still, he signs it) opens up with a spiel about how active the mafia is on Wall Street already … helping to draw the connection between his “godfather offer” and the actual organized crime figures. And that’s true, there have been plenty of mafia-controlled brokerage houses and boiler rooms, and investments that have been fronts for organized crime or that served to launder illicit cash.
But that’s not what Eifrig is really talking about — here’s how he describes his “godfather offer:”
“What I’m about to show you is a technique the mafia has used for several decades throughout the economy… not just on Wall Street.
“Traditionally, it’s been used by the mafia as a way of forcing payments of $100s to $1,000s at a time in a variety of sectors. Everything from restaurants and hotels… to utilities… grocery stores… barber shops… you name it.
“But what I’m talking about is a particular way to apply this technique to the equities market, allowing you to force $720 (or more) from some of the wealthiest investors – overnight.
You get paid no matter what… and it works on 3,500+ stocks.
“For example, I recently used the ‘Godfather Offer’ to force a $1,296.02 payment from a wealthy investor in Microsoft (MSFT) and $2,157 from a wealthy investor in Plum Creek Timber (PCL).
“The best part is, it’s all anonymous and done by computer. You don’t ever have to worry about the other person finding out who you are.”
Still sounds mysterious, right? I don’t have any idea where the $720 number comes from — it might be an average of recent payouts, or some number that they’ve just focus-grouped to determine that it “sounds right,” not so high that it seems unattainable, not so low that it’s not worth subscribing.
OK, so what on earth does he mean when he says you’re “forcing” money from wealthy investors?
“In short, I’m talking about protection money.
“In case you’ve never heard of this term before, it’s a form of payment collected by the mafia. They force their victims to pay it in exchange for receiving “protection” their victims don’t really need…
“Essentially – the money is forced from the victim. Or as The Washington Post put it, it’s way of using “threats to extract payments.”
“The good news is: You don’t ever have to physically force or threaten anyone to collect the protection money I’m describing here.”
Huh? OK, some of you have no doubt already connected the dots and guessed what Eifrig is talking about … but we do get some more teasing to help fill in those lines ….
“But the great thing is… the way it works allows you to FORCE hundreds of dollars in ‘protection money’ from the wealthiest investors in the market, obligating them to pay you immediately….Are you getting our free Daily Update
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“For example, even as you’re reading this, you can force a payment of:
“$850 from an investor in Amazon (AMZN)
“$920 from an investor in Intel (INTC)
“$870 from an investor in Coca-Cola (KO)
:As Peter Hues, who forced a payment from an investor in Budweiser recently told me, ‘Presto! Over $8,000 in my account.’
“He went on to say: ‘I don’t buy stocks anymore.’
“I don’t blame him. To me – this is a much easier way to make money in the stock market than trying to guess which stocks will go up or down.”
Well, on the off chance that you didn’t run out and subscribe to his newsletter after this point in the “presentation,” he does then get into more reasonable descriptions of his strategy … eventually. So we learn this about how he targets rich folks in this way:
“You see, if you’ve ever met someone who’s truly wealthy, then you probably know that when it comes to spending money… the rich are willing to blow thousands of dollars on things they don’t ever really need…
“Or to put it differently… they buy insurance. Lots of it…. some rich people insure their investments.
“And as you’re about to see – there’s a little-known way for you to target these rich investors in 3,500 stocks… and collect a small portion of that “protection money” overnight. Often, $720 or more.
“Then… you just walk away. The money is yours to keep.”
And then, still later on as we near the end of the “presentation,” Eifrig actually tells us a bit more about it … he doesn’t use the actual precise words that you’d give to your broker, but he walks right up to the edge. So anyone who’s familiar with options trading will know right away what he’s talking about … but of course, lots of folks on the megabazillion name mailing lists they use have no idea what options trading is. Here’s the last bit where he gets into some more detail about what this actual “racket” that he calls “the perfect transaction” is:
“You see, there are 2 things that can happen when you use this transaction…
“1. Investors buy protection for ridiculous scenarios that have little chance of ever taking place… like Apple’s share price falling from $300 to $15.
“These are the opportunities I look for, where you simply pull the trigger… and collect hundreds of dollars overnight. The ridiculous scenario doesn’t take place and the “protection” soon expires worthless.
“Then… you just walk away.
“Of the 8 times I’ve shared this transaction with other people in 2010… this is what ALWAYS happened, 100% of the time.
“2. Of course, theoretically… the ridiculous scenario could actually take place. But even if it does – it’s no big deal. All it means is that you’re obligated to buy the underlying stock.
“You still get to keep the money you collect, no matter what.
“Not to mention, we only use the “Godfather Offer” on stocks we’d be happy to buy regardless… because they’re outstanding companies.
“Yet the simple truth is that my success rate finding the perfect transactions in the space of 2010 alone was 100%.”
So there you have it — the “godfather offer” is … selling put options.
And Eifrig’s description above is more or less accurate — if you choose the right stocks and don’t make a mistake, this can be an extremely easy way to